This Belongs in a Museum: Tom Hanks and Dan Akroyd's Rap Video

Remember that scene in Raiders of The Lost Ark where the Nazis opened the Arc Of The Covenant? Well, I’ve donned my fedora and whip and adventured ‘cross the internet to find you a dangerous relic from another mysterious, magical and ultimately terrifying period of human history: The 80’s. And what I've found is shocking: a music video starring Tom Hanks and Dan Akroyd for the little known movie adaptation of Dragnet. They rap. And It’s going to melt your face. Off.

You actually watched it? You crazy bastard. Well, you must be wondering why your ears are bleeding. That'll be the curse...yeah, I probably should have mentioned that. You see, in the eighties everybody kind of worshipped this pagan god of blood sacrifices -- you have to remember porn was a lot harder to come by then. It's why they got so many Princes, Back To The Futures and rubiks cubes and why we have Justin Bieber, Twilight and she-wees. Not to worry, just share the video with a sucker friend within seven days and T-chaka The Goat Headed Blood Fiend won't rise from his fiery temple of bones to, you know, kill you and stuff.

"Your soul is mine!"

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